This is the 11 o'clock news with David McHammon

This is the 11 o'clock news with David McHammon reporting. This just in, a pool bus full of otters has collided with a fringe-top surrey, no casualties. In other news, an albatross

continues to follow people around, clinging to the backs of businessmen with dirty secrets. Today's traffic report is brought to you by Geico, where you could save 15% or more on

your auto insurance," The Gecko croaked. The sound engineer avoided eye contact with the Gecko. The Gecko grabbed his American Spirit cigarette out of the ashtray and squinted

at the random dot stereogram the sound engineer had posted above the mixer. "Could never make those damn things out," the Gecko complained. "It's a nude lady," said the shy

Lady in the blue dress. A flying mannequin or two added to the aura of sanity during a surrealistic summer like this one. The Gecko loved flying mannequins after seeing one at the

hats, itty bitty gloves, and teeny weeny snakeskin boots. The Gecko rented a plane and prepared for his first sky diving adventure. It was

going to be one of the best experiences they would ever have. There's not many Geckos in this world who would take this risk. What's better than to be the first? The Gecko

stepped out in front of the hot camera lights, as the director shouted, "Were Rolling!" The Gecko proudly spoke his lines..."You could save 15% on your car insurance if

The gecko suddenly stopped mid-sentence. He couldn't finish. The directed gave him a worried glance, as he had worked with the lizard for a while and he seemed to be doing fine.