I felt like cooking something that day so

I felt like cooking something that day so I went to the market and ...

parked my car on a hill. Sadly the handbrake gave way and the car rolled back down the hill, mowing innocent shoppers down. It crashed through the market stalls. Vegetables went

took one and brandished the baby cuke like a tiny gun. He played knick-knack on my thumb. His name was Paddy, and he had a strange way of getting home.

He would give the neighbourhood dog a bone. Then, he would throw himself onto the ground and rolled all the way back to his home. It was entertaining during the first 3 times but

by the time he reached 4 the bruises began to show. He decided he would instead push a young boy down a hill while he was trying to get some water from a well with his sister, but

Jack and Jill had had it what that story and are venturing out on their own. Jack is the King and his sister Jill is his queen. They each have a neice. and a daughter. Her name is

Pruscilla, and her and the rest of her family are staring at them from the dinner table. Well, ON the dinner table. Their heads are on silver plates, their bodies slumped on chairs

reflexively bringing forkfulls of food up to the gaping space where their mouths would be if their heads weren't on those silver platters. A head stirs, the mouth opening as if to

scream out for help, but no sound is heard. The dark cocktail party continues, the headless guests sat at the head of the table. Will somebody please pass the hors d'oeuvres?