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Once upon a time, well, present day, there

  • Once upon a time, well, present day, there were two old Apple 2E computers from 1983 that sat side by side in Rob's office, with dusty covers over them. They were in love. "Baby,

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  • " one of them spoke with an electronic tone, "Why are we used as of slaves?" before the other could answer Microsoft Sam ruins the moment with his SWOOSH copter, so Rob

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  • Zombie, in a fit of sanity, decided to call it quits on his directorial career. "I'm really not that good," he admitted to his psychiatrist. Little did he know that this mild-

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  • mannered secretary had been influencing him through subtle alterations to his paperwork. Now that Mr. Zombie had called it quits, she would take over as the new dictator for life.

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  • Thanks to Teresa's ability of harnessing the zombie Mind, this arrangement came to her attention back in Africa. She decided that this one called for her personal attention.

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  • Packing a suitcase filled with magic card and disappearing bunnies. Teresa donned her magic hat and flew back home to Australia, where

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  • she met with her cousin Kiki. "How's the parcel delivery business?" Teresa asked her. "It's taking off," she said, and cackled gleefully. As a parlor magician, Teresa could only

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  • Do occultist rituals and predict future trends in the era after the Internet. Gerald Celente used snail mail to post his newsletters. Life had profoundly changed. Mr. Micriphone

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  • "Yes it really has. That saddens, maddens, and gladdens me at the same time. Without change we stagger like wrong man in her husband's bed. Thanks for the bizzzzzzzzznis & out the

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  • wazoo we go!" And with that, they flew out the window. I stared at the sky long after they'd disappeared, smoking and wondering what on God's Earth they had been talking about.

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