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After their relativistic journey back to

  • After their relativistic journey back to an earthlike planet in the year 5239 A.D. Cdr.. Landly, and Mj. Stroganoff discover that an intelligent species of Pachyderm rule

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  • s the the galaxy. Then they plan on blowing up DC for no good reason other that they can. The bomb dropped. but, it suddenly shrunk into a small grenade and blew up a hot dog stand

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  • and then my wonder twin said "Form of Ice Crowbar!" Gleek the space monkey screamed to be let out of his cage, so I

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  • used Jace on the cage. Unfortunately, an ice crowbar has a low load level and my twin shattered. Gleek discovered he could just slide through the bars. "Does anyone have a mop?"

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  • I opened my laptop and logged on to the world surveillance network. I queried the number of households on earth with one or more mops. Result: 10340299. "Yes," I calmly told Gleek.

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  • "You were right, I was wrong. Mops are clearly superior to Swiffers," I gave in. Gleek gloated with pleasure for about five minutes before I punched him in the stomach

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  • Yes, and another thing that had me at a loss for words was seeing polar bears doing Pepsi commercials. I asked Santa for his thoughts. "They're corporate ho ho hoes," he said.

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  • "Just like the reindeer who took over my operation, saying I was too old. Even the wife and the elves said I deserved to retire. My own Christmas present." Santa sighed. I was

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  • overcome with pity for this fat man. "Look", I proposed, "You're too old for this, man. All the houses in a day?" And like that, I pushed him off the cliff. I am the new Santa.

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3 Comments

  1. SlimWhitman May 08 2012 @ 10:07

    Well, you don't see that every day - an empty fold . . . - Mops are clearly superior.

  2. Chaz May 08 2012 @ 18:07

    Certain parts of the "Super Friends" incident have redacted to protect the innocent.

  3. BlastedHeath May 08 2012 @ 20:28

    Yet another regrettable moment from my July 13th period.

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