But at Yar's funeral all Data could think

But at Yar's funeral all Data could think about was the episode where he and Yar did the nasty. That was great. He had a photographic memory. Picard waited. So Data said,

"Hey, did I ever show you the video of Yar?" Of course, he had. Many times. Picard had no interest in seeing it yet again. "Yes, Data, you did; and I have told you, that's not

definitive proof Tasha's still alive. Your own sensors tell you that" Data did this whenever Picard went to the holodeck as Det. Hill. No time for lovesick 'droids, tonight's case

involved "The Murdered Sandpiper's Wife." Ick. Picard grimaced at the title, but then, Det. Hill was written in the early 20th century. He awaited Data's ensuing awkward questions

In esperanto which jolly good fellows understood.

So naturally I went to find some good fellows, but all I saw were Longfellows.

We staged a reading of his poems in the school auditorium, but most of the students and staff fell asleep. To the principal's dismay, the school board chose that day to inspect

the restrooms. Someone said they were people looking through a hole to see the girls changing clothes, taking shower, the principal was shocked to know that the pervert was himself

one of the school's teachers. He'd already been accused of having sexual affair with his students. And now he was caught watching the tapes he recorded through the hole on the wall

. The PTA, avoiding scandal, kidnapped him the next night & hauled him (bound with duct tape) out to the Chatahoochie River & dumped his predatory a**. Nobody ever said nuthin'.