I looked fearfully at the small woods bordering

I looked fearfully at the small woods bordering his home and at the finger of dark water that jutted out of the overgrowth and barely touched

a twisted tree that reached ominously in every direction. It was an optical illusion. A painting that followed you. The branches reached out at you, ever closer, even as you

walked away. The painting floated after you, first across the alter, then over the pews. I looked around to see if anyone else saw this. Nope. They were just going about their

incantations over the wine and host without regard to the portrait levitating overhead. Yes, it was Advent, but

no wine, no stained glass windows - what kind of a place was this? As she continued to take in the visual cacophony surrounding her, she heard one of the doors creak open and

a tiny priest entered, dressed in darkest black and carrying a cricket bat and a tray of cucumber sandwiches. At 2ft tall, he really was too small to

properly lay into the pledges but the comedic effect was too good for the Alpha Omegas to pass up. Brother Winston delicately stroked a cucumber sandwich with a sinister twinkle in

in his eye. Looking around at the other fruits and vegetables, he come across something strange. Brother Winston put down the cucumber sandwich, and picked up

an STD. But BW was tough. He laughed at health issues. He laughed at everything, being addicted to nitrous oxide. And you just don't come back from something like that.