I'm waking up covered in white powder. Oh

I'm waking up covered in white powder. Oh god is that what I think it is? Worst Columbus day party ever!

You see my parents are slow adults. So now you know why my teenage years are a horror. I have ADHD, my friends are super hyper and whenever I try to invite them over to my house

my eyes will start darting all over the place and lightning shoots out from the tip of my nose. My brain runs on meth fumes that explode on contact. I lost many of my friends

due to nasal lightning incineration on my part. I couldn't help it but I still regret it to this day and I grieve for those lost friends. How else can I live but far from anyone? L

ike a superhero with unrivaled powers, I knew my nasal lightning capabilites had to be reigned in. I would become its master, one nose blow at a time. It was time to train.

I blew into the tissue, not once, not twice, but three times. The green abomination flew from my nose. I had won this first battle, but this was just the start, and soon

the Battle of the Boogers would be raging in my head. Oh, I tried to stop it. I sent in a delegation of mediators. I even tried boycotting my finger massages,but this time, war was

Imminent. There was no way around it. This would be the war for the ages.

but then the two only participants simultaneously shot eachother and it sputtered out as its nameless victims fell into their own unmarked graves where they remained for the ages.