It was an unlit and tempestuous period between

It was an unlit and tempestuous period between sunset and sunrise, when ey sauntered inside. I was imbibing solitarily and quite ebrious. I gazed into eir optic opening and beheld

something that few men could only dream - a symphony of fiddler crabs playing Beethoven's 5th! "What a strange occurrence," I thought to myself, surely this has nothing to do with

those mushrooms I ate. I was certain that they were safe, but now, as the walls began to spin and my head felt on the verge of splitting open, doubt crept in. "Can the crabs play

nick-nack on my shoe?" I questioned. It seemed a most important question but i didn't know why. I stood up, only to fall head first into a forest of meandering rivers.

Flinging down the rapids gasping for air, I saw that my life choices were like the flow of the stream. It all made sense, until I slammed into a salmon which said

nothing; salmon don't talk, so I guess that made sense. But then I saw something that really made no sense - it was a talking waffle. I readied my spear as the waffle said,

"Slather me with syrup, I'm part of a balanced breeeakfast!" I was lied to by bits of sugar and marshmallow passing off as "nutritious," so I murmured "No dice, waffle" as my spear

"I'm sorry I have inconvienced you, dear sir, but I received a request to come and participate in some festivities located on these premises." Fried chicken smiled and then looked

very greasy. He'd never felt so cock-y. This was worth all his time spent in the pen. Festivities, demise, whatever you called it, sitting beside fruit jello was heaven.