Before her arrival, the house became full

Before her arrival, the house became full of odd devices. The washing machine decorated mom's room. A hole was made in the wall, so that the pipe would get into the bathroom.

It was a tight fit; anyone who needed to use the bathroom would have to squeeze past the pipe, which rested at eye-level, a thick rod of burningly bright orange that almost shone

in defiance. But Big Bob had to go...bad. The awkwardly placed orange pipe was at gut level for him, since he was almost 7 feet tall & weighed 500 lbs. Could he reach the commode

he wondered and stretched his arm out. Nope, the commode was in the next room. Big Bob was huge and disgusting. But Bob's Big Boy was cute in an oaffish way. And so it came

That Little Bob, his son, could eat for free at The Big Boy Restaurant. The burgers were second to none. Big Bob ate ramen noodles. The barista got a good cash tip as well.

Big Bob got a tip too never park in a loading zone or your car will be towed, & it was he was heart broken. it was a gift from his uncle Fred who'd passed on. Luckily the barista w

icked Cind served his favorite: a death by chocolate double shot frappachino latte with green tea whipped cream topping & winked. Big Bob raised his Latte to Uncle Fred's memory

and drank down the quaff. For a moment he could see heaven's gates and St. Peter waving him away. Big Bob woke up in the cardiac ward of Central Hospital. Wicked Cind was beside

herself, having refused to drink the quaffer, preferring to leave it untouched upon her eyebrows and feminine mustache and chin hairs. Big Bob, upon opening his eyes and seeing her

face, gasped from the comprehension that HIS wife, Tina, the actress, comes home every night with sticky, jelly-like stuff all over her hair, and says, “I hate f__king love scenes!