I was watching tv when I realized I had a

I was watching tv when I realized I had a third arm.Testing out the arm, I went outside and climbed a tree. I got bored easily, so I went back inside and ate some chips until

my third arm got filled with all the fat cells i had stored in my body and i looked i had one big tumor in my arm so i was getting self-conscious and i cut the third arm off while

chopping vegetables for Panda Express. My extra arm pieces went into the vegetable part. People were safe because they only loved the orange chicken, but then this Vegan chick

, trying to escape the quiet wrath of NINJA POPE (who detested vegan atheism) , hid behind the Panda Ex counter, sampled the veggie stir fry and then noticed the my chopped elbow

platter. Ninja Pope declined, having given spam baby up for lent. Blending in with foe vegans in the mall cafeteria, Ninja Pope conspired with the Pirate Nun in a secret rendezvous

at the organic wine company. Ninja Pope and the Pirate Nun planned to make the Church politically correct clandestinely. But first some wine tasting in the photobooth

which led to a series of juicy photos of the two being spread all over the internet. Ninja Pope swore by the cloth that he hadn't realized he was sitting in Pirate Nun's lap, but

time Buccaneer Bill and his crew shot the pirate about 50 times and threatened his three parrots to boot. The pirate was a changed man after that incident. But he clung to life w

ith the aid of lots of rum, and a nurse named Nancy, who not only cared for him, but taught his three parrots to sing Frank Sinatra's "My Way" in Spanish. Life was good, again!