"The only thing missing from that, is a sausage

"The only thing missing from that, is a sausage patty," said Robert. Then Mike woke up and said, "And maple syrup."

Pat chimed in "And a Belgian waffle", and soon we were back at our old game of trying to top each other's suggestions. We went for hours, ending finally with Bob's "radioactive

Spam Imperial Tacos." Our collective drool fugue told Pat, Bob and I that this was a winner. Pat chopped the green onions and I suited up to get the Spam from our hazmat pantry. Bo

Derek was in there! In our pantry! She handed me a can of organic black beans, so I invited her out to the kitchen to help us with the Spam Tacos. Pat, Bob, and I grinned at

how she flirted with me, licking her lips with the tip of her tongue while she gazed at me with those incredibly sensuous eyes, he bosom heaving with all the passion that sizzled

. I stared more carefully at her heaving he-bosom. She explained that her luxuriant chest hair insulated her from in the arctic winds working on the trawlers. She gave me a kipper

And I provided chips. The polar vortex was due to visit again. In fact it was ringing the doorbell!

Just to be safe I looked out from the side of the curtain. Sure enough it was the polar vortex pretending to be hiding a bottle of Dead Monk's Hard Headlice Cider behind his back.

Throwing the curtain aside I addressed the Polar Vortex coquettishly: "Would you happen to have any Dead Monk's Hard Headlice Cider behind your back for me?" Sheepishly he produced

a flagon of the finest ice cold depilatory distillate i've nipped at, but I secretly yearned for El Niños Southern Comforts.