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Aside from the officially recognized French

  • Aside from the officially recognized French cheeses with Appellation there were many others lesser known. In a village in the Alsace I stumbled on one fermented from the toe jam of

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  • of the one toed sloth, not an easy job,toe jam collecting, especially if the sloth was being a bit antsy as sloths are prone to be, add the fact that the fermentation process will

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  • make enough gas to fill a blimp, (it will not rise it's a heavy gas), once completely fermented the Toe Jam is mixed with Jerky to make Pemmican. The Indian survival food sold to

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  • Whole Foods in the Southwestern region. The enriched mindless shoppers

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  • had no idea that the salad bar had been sneezed on by a man with contagious forms of narcolepsy and rickets. The Whole Foodies dropped like unmanned Avatars in the cheese aisle.

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  • The disease spread and soon vegans were vegging out everywhere. The government ordered a prohibition on fresh produce. Salad bars became speak-easies. But the sleep sickness was

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  • hitting the police's mental acuity hard. "That's not illegal lettuce you've got there, is it?" asked one officer. "No, it's pot." he replied. "Oh, okay." Later the officer realized

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  • that pot could have multiple meanings, but the sleeper drugs added by Dunkin Donuts made him

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  • well, sleep. He woke up to find himself in a cellar, wrapped up in chains. A giant hole opened beneath him and he plummeted down, down, down until landing on

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  • a bed of what smelled like hay. Who kept hay under a house? That's bound to cause mold and mildew. Your skin crawling, you don't hear the leprechaun slit your throat. Ces't la vie.

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3 Comments

  1. Slyfknot8302 Feb 15 2012 @ 11:20

    Damn, I've been write second-person in another story and I just realized I totally changed the view in the last snippet. My bad.

  2. SlimWhitman Feb 15 2012 @ 13:21

    It happens to everyone sometimes. Anyway, I find it works here. It's like the narrator addressing the reader and shrugging his shoulders about the hero's demise.

  3. Slyfknot8302 Feb 15 2012 @ 14:48

    Nice, good point.

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