I hadn't thought it them for years. Horned

  • I hadn't thought it them for years. Horned Toads. Then today I saw one in the back yard. first I though of one and then I saw one. Did the thought make it happen or pre-deja view.

  • Was I living my life in past-perfect-future tense? While I stewed about this grammatical quandary, the horned toad was attacked by a garter snake. Didn't see that one coming.

  • The garter snake was wrapped around the hostesses thigh. I was looking a little higher up which is why I missed it. The horny toad was also distracted and was eaten by the snake.

  • Which was eaten by an eagle. Which was eaten by Avion Bird Flu. Which was eaten by anti-biotics. Which was eaten by a dude named Ralph, which was eaten

  • by the constellation Serpentarius, which was eaten by Audrey 2, which was eaten by Puff the Magic Dragon, which was eaten by a magic demon , which was eaten by John Goodman, which

  • was eaten by a green slime, which eventually ate itself. Everyone just stood around with their jaws agape. Did all that just transpire in 4 minutes? Things were about to get

  • nasty, especially since Jack had lost his last remaining teeth. Where to go now? They seemed to be totally surrounded by those things. If only someone could step in and

  • help. Jack was looking a little long in the tooth, at least until he lost his teeth. Now pushed to the brink of madness, Jack took a deep breath and gummed the creepy crawly things

  • until they were soft and gushy. Then he swallowed. The aftertaste reminded Jack of his Aunt Valetta's Hungarian Goulash. Really bad. Putrid. Jack's memories returned like a flood

  • stinging his eyes with warm tears. Aunt Valetta, she would have cooked hundreds of goulashes and yet, to jack, the sweetest goulash would always be the last; the goulash of love.



  1. PurpleProf Sep 13 2014 @ 10:04

    SO funny! Welcome to FoldingStory, Bengman. I loved your ending because if you knew my Aunt Valetta (long since passed), you'd know that she did indeed make hundreds of dreadful goulashes. Because I loved her so much, though, I ate them.

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