The rabbit whispered sweet secrets. "You

  • The rabbit whispered sweet secrets. "You know what you need to do, Fluttershy. Burn the house down. BURN THEM ALL!" Then it chuckled diabolically, twitching its whiskers.

  • Then the rabbit stopped laughing. The Paranormal Rabbit from Donnie Darko was at the party. He was talking to Bugs Bunny in drag. He decided to reach into his old bag of Trixx.

  • It was here, beyond all probability, that Elmer Fudd actually got a shot off and blew the rabbit's thoughts against the wall. They truly were not that interesting anyhow.

  • He finally bagged his wabbit... Elmer left the glue factory with the skinned corpse and later prepared it as his supper. What's up

  • wabbit? Elmer scooted his chair aside satisfied with a fine hasenpfeffer. But then the existensial delimema settled in, "Was he just a Nimrod? a total Maroon? what was left?" Bugs

  • had defined his existence. He fell into a tewibble funk. "I ate duh wabbit. I'm sowwy Bugsy." He began to blubber. Then Elmer buried his big bald head in this pudgy hands and wept.

  • This stood as a defining moment in the world of animation, when these two-dimensional pixies learned of foresight and consequences. Gleaming children the world over realized

  • that no amount of clapping could ever resurrect Tinker Bell. Thus, it was the end of The Age of Innocence. No longer could children believe in cartoons, super-heroes, or fairies.

  • Adults made sure their kids understood that death was inevitable, Santa wasn't real and life wasn't fair. The children all grew up to become gloomy adults themselves.

  • The End. "Now, I don't know about you boys and girls," the teacher spoke, "but there were some valuable lessons in that story." Jimmy, 5 years old, raised his hand. "Bullshit."



  1. PurpleProf Oct 03 2015 @ 10:02


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