On Christmas morning Johnny rushed down

On Christmas morning Johnny rushed down the stairs, excited to see what Santa had left under the Christmas tree. Only what he saw under the tree,ruined all of his excitement!

Johhny didn't care. He didn't need presents. He walked over to the road and stuck his thumb out. A little while later a flash car pulled up, the window wound down & sitting there w

as a small dog, sitting on a large book, its paws resting gingerly on the steering wheel. 'Get in, stranger,' she growled. 'I can take you to see the Dog Master, but no further tha

n that, because that is where the cat's territory is." The stranger hestitated but eventually took a seat next to the driving canine. They drove off but were suddenly

Confronted by a suspect Cetan asking questions about secret government cheeses. He could neither confirm or deny the presence or absence of and government cheese or cheeses, inclu

ding the super smelly sock kind. Cetan could ask about the cheeses until he was blue in the face (Blue Cheese?) but he'd never break me. I was trained at the Academie de la Fromage

Dansant, where I learned convoluted modern jazz routines alongside some of the finest cheeses in Paris. I didn't realise how much I'd learned about those cheese's cultures until I

found myself ordering a bottle of lactose in a French cafe, much to my date's surprise. "Watch me convert this into lactic acid," I told her as she rapidly disappeared. The cheese

however, ended up besting me. Hours later I found myself trapped on a porcelain throne as the cheese blasted out of my asshole. I never ate cheese again.