My mother had always warned me about this.

My mother had always warned me about this. Its not like I didn't believe her--its just that I didn't think it would ever happen to me. I never thought it could happen to me. But

it did. I was trying to comprehend what happened here before I apparently passed out: I was wearing a green skirt, and there was a dancing monkey with a hat tied to my ankle.

It was one of those little marmosets, you know the kind with that fuzzy white hair splayed out around the sides of its head? If I remember correctly, which is unlikely in light of

subsequent events, this marmoset was the marmoset I loved most in the whole world. Such an adorable marmoset!

Naturally its adorableness was short lived. It eventually turned on us. You wouldn't believe a marmoset was be capable of that, but they are, believe me. Spy the peg leg.

The marmoset with the peg leg moved with astonishing speed. It scratched someone's face, and licked someone else's. Everyone was running about screaming. I dashed for cover under

a large balloon shaped like a hamster. The peg-leg marmoset turned its gaze towards me, and I instantly knew that it was the end for me. With lightning quick speed, it ravaged my

face, biting and tearing at flesh. The rodent buried itself in blood and meat, gouging my eyes and crushing my nose. After a few minutes struggle, I managed to pull the monster off

The injuries caused by the rodent were severe but it was the psychology damage that would be the most devastating because when I fell asleep the rodent violently raped me. I swore

to exterminate every rodent I saw. After years of slaying the pests, Earth's ecosystem broke down and the world turned to chaos. Now I think rodents are pretty cool.