With plastic shovel, Jeremy dug in the backyard.

With plastic shovel, Jeremy dug in the backyard. He knew China would take awhile, so he just settled on lost pirate loot or oil. Hitting the two foot mark, he heard a hollow thump

and pulled out a trick box with two nifflers trapped inside, so he knew he must be getting close to some treasure.

Hesitating, he reached to the key in his pocket. with shaking hands, he opened the box. after years of waiting. but inside the box was somthing above all he imagined, inside there

he saw all he imagined, with that something resting on top of it all. From its ponderous jowls sprouted whiskers longer than pixie sticks, and a breath like sour milk. "Happy

Birthday, Jim!" growled the tiger with foul breath. All of Jim's chidhood dreams cumulated in this one defining moment. Everyone blew their party horns and began to sing

the ceremonial song as the tiger lovingly ate Jim, savoring every tasty bite. After the tiger was satiated the group blew their party horns again, celebrating Jim's birthday.

Jim died well on his birthday: Time to settle his affairs, an appreciative lion, some habañero sauce -- but Spock wondered about sensation and mentation. A little Stevie Wonder

look alike starting singing "Black Orchid" while Jim and Spock continued their arcane reverie. "Pause simulation" said Number One. He'd been training inside a starfleet nightmare

with Riker's mind...sadly, they all discovered that Riker's mind was actually just another beard inside of his head.