Take it from me: if your recent folds are

Take it from me: if your recent folds are all about food, you should unskip lunch. Similarly, if they're all about unrequited love, find yourself a sock (I splurge on argyle) and

then find the matching sock. Put socks on, then undies, pants and shirt. Don't forget shoes. Brush teeth. Go to the rectangle thing in your wall called a "door." See that metal

band hiding under your bed? Go under there and bang your head along with them. While you are under there, pick up all those crusty argyle socks you threw under there. After washing

your hair in restaurant waste, you must walk backwards over a quarter mile of hot coals, wear a suit of glass shards to social events for a month, and then, only then, will you be

truly free from the shackles that western society has placed upon you. If you live in an eastern society, however, there is an entirely different set of traditions. First, you must

face west to worship the shopping meccas of Mammon. You must remain outwardly loyal to the Great Leader but wear jeans under your dayclothes. For at nightfall in the East

The great King of Tea was looking for someone to fold stories with.I volunteered. We folded stories all night. At sunrise, we fell asleep and had tea at noon. This kelp mixture was

his wasn't the worst one in the world, but it hadn't won the Betty Crocker Kelp-Off, which is why he shot it out of the window in the first place. It was only a coincidence that

his salty creation catapulted into the air and landed right in Betty's crock-pot. Or was it? For that final stunt, he was awarded extra points, which pushed him into 2nd place.