David coughed up dust and sand after tripping

David coughed up dust and sand after tripping and falling face first into the foxhole. Whitman chuckled, "You can't run! When you run, you go from being the hunter to the hunted."

David's eyes welled up. He couldn't speak & turned away. "Oh now, so you're going to sulk all night? Look, we got a war to fight here. Man up, dude!" Bullets whizzed overhead & a

passing tank ran him over. Ouch! David was devastated; the whole night buddies were being killed in front of him. Who was next? The quartermaster approached:"I made sausage.."BOOM!

The sausage shot David! The Quartermaster jumped in the passing tank, decapitated the driver, and took control. He swore revenge upon the sausage and fired blindly into the chaos.

"As God is my witness," swore the Quartermaster, "no luncheon meat will live to see tomorrow's dawn!" He stepped on the tank's accelerator and sped down the street, firing in every

direction. God, who was the Quartermaster's witness, told him to cut it out. The Quartermaster, who had already taken out many luncheon meats with his tank, opted to

Eat less luncheon meat because of its nitrites and salt causing his blood pressure to spike through the roof. God couldn't afford any more roof repairs after the last time.

So God had to trudge his way down to the Divine Bank and ask for a Home Improvement Loan to fix up his slice of Heaven. His loan officer was Godfreid. Godfreid looked over God's ap

plication, glanced up, and saw God in front of his desk--- looming, barechested, with a machete in one hand ---poised. "Congratulations, God! Your loan is approved", Godfreid said.