There was an old man who is known to resolve

There was an old man who is known to resolve any problem. One day a girl went to the old man and asked for a piece of advice about

the nature of man. Why was it that the human race was at odds with itself and all around it. Instead of living modest lives most seemed consumed by greed. His answer was simple..

There were too many things in the world that were well, just things. But humans gave them names. Cars, for example. Not owning one, you forget they have personalities. It is absurd

Such lonely people, car owners, so cut off from the world that they name their vehicles. None of my bikes ever had a name, and I only do because it was a thing back in the day. Cat

Burglar is a good name for you. But your mom was high on cat nip when she gave birth so I guess you can blame her for all the teasing you got on the playground growing up. My name

is a mystery, even to me. Sure, I have nicknames, but none of them ever stick for very long. I suppose that's the thing about having nine lives - each life is a little different.

That’s the thing about us cats. While our lives are always different, we remember them all. We remember our previous owners. I particularly remember

cats can't be wrong. Or can they? In another life I was a film producer churning out lousy films in a Hollywood suburb, but having a good time and scraping by. My last film was

"Bring on the Cats, There Ought to be Cats." But it was stolen by some NY Broadway douche who shortened it and the title to "Cats"...arsehole...