The butter carving hall at the State Fair

The butter carving hall at the State Fair was packed when Becky unveiled her sculpture of the Egyptian leader. Entitled Moobarak, it was an incredible likeness. Until Amir scythed

her head off and her death was a feta accompli. The Amir was a bloodthirsty munster who was no gouda which is why

she wasn't going to play chicken with this crazed psycho. No, she had no beef with him so she decided to go on the lamb. If it wasn't for

her desire to get porked, she'd be gone now. He tried to apologize, but made a complete hash of it. "I do love you," she said, "but the proof is in the pudding." He sobbed

into his already watered down bowl of pudding. "You know what goes well with pudding?" she asked seductively. "A whipped cream bikini!" And with that she grabbed the can and began

at a nearby quadriplegic. Naturally, the "stump" wasn't as amused as she was. Of course, he woulda been, had he known about the miracle whip in her double D cups, but as it was,

the Miracle Whip went undetected in the bra as it languished under the bed waiting for laundry day. After months of fermenting and mating with dust bunnies it became a disgusting

beast, mindless but capable of motion. It crawled its way out of the mess of wadded up shirts and used condoms, and the sound shuddering through its proboscis echoed down the

hallway and into little Suzie's room. "Aww Carl, I told you the movie was too loud, now you've woken up the baby!" said Linda. "It's ok, this movie kind of sucks anyway."