A tisket a tasket, a delicious clotted crumpet,

A tisket a tasket, a delicious clotted crumpet, tea with milk & their ilk wrapped in silk in a picnic basket delivered by a strumpet. But she dropped it, dropped it, yes on the way

she dropped it. A dainty madame came along and slid it into her sarong, planning to hock it. Madame Wong was so moved that she wrote a song about the ordeal, calling it

"Voulez-vous voucher avec moi ce soir?" Madame Womg played the banjo. She employed a 'resting' electrician from Trans-Caucasus to accompany her on the bongos and Simon Le Bon to

Sing the lyrics backwards, counting the syllables. The orchestra played backwards, then forwards two notes, the backwards again. The audience went wild.

And this is precisely when It happened

. I looked back at the principal. "Really?" he said. "Really." I said. He tipped back in his chair. Muffled fire alarms reverberated behind me. "Well, I am going to call your mom."

"Shouldn't we bail out first?" I asked nervously. Smoke seeped in from under the principal's door. "Young man, I set the priorities here!" He dialed Mom on his cell. Flames licked

the legs of my chair as he listened to my mother's answering tone. It was The Blue Clyde's Contentedly Numb (Stallion-Muskrat strumming Mix). I was literally in the hot seat by the

time my mom called him back. "Your Mom says you're innocent," he said, "We're letting you go." But before they could unstrap me, a power surge caused the electric chair to flare up

. Yet, fortunately I was wearing my rubber pants & (short of a few singes) I was fine. The guards unstrapped me reluctantly. A double 1-finger salute & sashayed outta there!