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I found the SAT's writing portion to be an

  • I found the SAT's writing portion to be an unwelcome addition to an already unwelcome test. Feeling rebellious, I wrote naught but an intro preceded by the title "SAT Essay Tease."

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  • "This will keep me out of college", I thought. I proceeded to write the most banal paragraph ever, filled with racial slurs and a lot of instances of the word, "uh". My parents

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  • have really bad credit scores, and I consider that to be a kind of abuse. They didn't hit me or verbally abuse me, but I was never able to

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  • reconcile with them over the credit ratings they foisted upon me. They said my arbitrary number was "poor", so the banks shipped us all to special labor camps in the midwest.

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  • Most of the "guests" as the prisoners were called, were victims of identity theft. We worked in bank owned sweat shops until one by one we mysteriously disappeared. I tried to keep

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  • my head down so nobody would notice me. I didn't really expect that to help much. They were really rather uncanny, sometimes. Not just the bankers themselves, but

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  • their assistants too. They glided back and forth until eventually one of them noticed me. "Are you keeping your head down, boy?" He asked.

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  • "No, leave me alone" I said,with a tense edge to my voice

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  • "Are you tense?" She asked. I shook my head sheepishly. "We can help you here, you know."

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  • "I don't need your help!" I screamed. "I don't need anyone!" I suddenly jumped out the window and fell about three feet. I forgot the psychology clinic was on the ground floor.

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