There's something I need to tell you. It's

There's something I need to tell you. It's hard for me to say, but I must be truthful. I'm a Scottish highland dancer.

After hearing his confession, she knew the blind date was heading into the toilet. She'd dated a Scot before and knew

the dangers of kilts on a windy day. She stuffed the caviar in her mouth, washed it down with the rest of the Dom and

an ashtray of dead cigarettes that she found lying on the table. The howling gusts blew in while

she heard the familiar sound of Charlie's breath, except it was faint and slow, as if he was

Very close. Right in her ear in fact. She was worried, horrified even, but intrigued. What could Charlie want?

She thought his he hungry and then she went to the kitchen and made some Salisbury steak.

Some pepper, and some salt, and yummy, it's done. When she was finished, she licked her fork and plate clean.

Then watched in horror as the bill set in front of her totaled $642.