Pain was imbedded into me, like the bullet

Pain was imbedded into me, like the bullet into my lung. Blood seeped out and made the floor wet and slimy. My clothes were being stained a darker color. Too bad I wore white. Who

would have guessed someone would shoot the snowman mascot for the Christmas parade? I could barely see out of my oversized head, but everybody seemed to be panicking.

My oversized head weakened my neck muscles. So, I'd wrapped a giant wheel of duct tape around my neck. Time made it gooey and black. People were freaking out at the parade but

I just continued smiling and waving, scaring the children. I was glad when the parade ended because I had no idea why I was there. My oversized head, putrid neck & I got a job as a

Meeter and Greeter at ZombieWorld. Small children screamed when they saw my grotesque countenance. I shuffled and stumbled after them. All I wanted was to be accepted. Senior manag

nature. We don't discriminate, like people with brains, the cerebrally challenged are welcome too, so are those with missing limbs, the aged, the disenfranchised, in short zombies

Are coming inside the wig shop to find rare Pokemons and are willing to look at wigs just to hatch eggs. Once hatched, the eggs attack them and run the bloody zombies out the door!

"Those zombies have stolen my wigs!" shouts Gladys, the wig shop owner, "Stop them!" Zombies in pompadours, Marie Antionettes and shags stagger down the street in search of brains.

Now, the reason I know all this is because that was me under the stairs that you heard when you were gutting that Federal Man. He hadn't seen any zombies like you told them.