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heather hritzel

  • heather hritzel

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  • never saw the attack coming. She was poised at her keyboard, ready to lay down 180 characters of sublime prose when a benevolent assailant kidnapper Heather and took her to Disney

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  • World and said that she was not actually trying to kidnap her and was actually just trying to take her to Disney world because she said she liked being there.

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  • "Technically this IS kidnapping, second degree thus far," argued the girl. The hooded kidnapper said, "You make me sicker than a spinning teacup, but my husband, Mickey, wants you

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  • to put up or shut up." The kidnapper's cowardice was obvious. The so-called victim opened a bag of Hot Fries and told the Kidnapper to bring a message to Mickey, "Tell him this

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  • Daily ration of McGriddles at £1 each is putting me in the poorhouse and the hospital. I have to change. My diet!" Mickey D got the message and replied the price was set by Dr. Dog

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  • yeared O'Reilley seven years ago. The price would be reset by Dr. Dogyeared O'Reilley tomorrow but until then Mickey Ds will be using the Shukhronaamundo tablets. "McGriddles for

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  • people on drugs" was the tagline. And sure enough, stoned people came out of the woodwork to buy these McGriddles, using change they had found under their sofa cushions. They smell

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  • like marrowwanna and eerie lackawanna, but somehow manage to launder their sofa cushions once a month under the full moon, even though the stoners lack a sofa. Craving McGriddles,

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  • they ended up at Waffle House 'cos they took a wrong turn on Rt. 278. "Hey, let's just live here! We can just bring our cushions in here & stay." So they did. Smothered & covered.

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1 Comments

  1. LordVacuity Oct 15 2019 @ 00:01

    I like mine capped, diced, and peppered.

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