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Stepping into his apartment, Steve noticed

  • Stepping into his apartment, Steve noticed for the first time that there was a grey squirrel sitting on his sofa, right where he swore the night before he had left his prized

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  • Nut sculpture of the Battle of 1812. His only accomplishment in life, a blue ribbon at the 4H fair of 1972 was now in the fat paunch of that grey squirrel sagging into the sofa

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  • King's memory. He'd traded stuffing dead squirrels for the east job of selling sofa's. But then, a giant squirrel in a trench coat came into the store smoking a stogie.

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  • The giant squirrel skittered up to the counter and suddenly froze sideways, chewing rapidly on the stogie, dropping ashes everywhere."You looking for a sofa?" I asked. The squirrel

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  • wiggled its whiskers and chirped. "There's one in the den," I said. "Just be careful and don't get your nuts stuck between the cushions." The squirrel took a drag from its stogie.

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  • "Is that a smart aleck reference to my testicles?" shouted the squirrel angrily, dropping his cigar, "Yah, they're fuzzy. And I suppose you wanna know how me and my wife do it? She

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  • And I will never reveal our secret!" The squirrel vamoosed into his hole and minded his business. That was just as well since there was a red fox on the loose.

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  • Foxi Red LaRue was a tough vixen. She kept her den clean but things ended up getting done when getting them done meant that Foxi got done. She liked getting got. She like it a lot.

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  • But when Foxi awoke she found none other than Mr. Potatohead lying naked beside her. She was in an oven! "Holy Seamonkeys, I'm the main course!" she gasped. Through the oven window

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  • she saw stick man. He tried to save her but ended up adding fuel to the fire. It was the tater tots who saved them. Years of counseling find their father nude next another woman.

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