"Go, Pikachu!" The little pixelated red and

"Go, Pikachu!" The little pixelated red and white ball flung across the screen and out popped the little electric rat. This was gonna be a tough battle, especially if it's against

thunderbolt attack. But, as expected, this had failed. The underdog wasn't really a pikachu. He was just a simple parrot, dressed as a rat. The opponent could help but

Chose not to, as opponents often do.

But when you've been betrayed, the decision becomes so much harder. All of your instincts against the lesser of two evils whither when the difference becomes negligible.

But then what about the lesser of two goods? Or the lesser of two mediocres? That's right, I'm a barrista and I am determined to work as little as possible without getting

fired from Starbucks. Where else can I sling overpriced coffee and scowl at the "professionals" from behind my formica and glass counter? Plus, they have good health benefits.

Those "professionals" never impressed me. I usually daydreamed about pouring sugary, Italian flavor syrups all over them, and then placing them bound in the entomology lab, but

I'd never be that cruel to insects. The thought of innocent bugs stuck to the backsides of prostitutes breaks my heart. I opened the can of

Four Loko and poured it onto the cracked asphalt below the porch. For all of those who have gone before us, and all who are to come.