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"Go, Pikachu!" The little pixelated red and

  • "Go, Pikachu!" The little pixelated red and white ball flung across the screen and out popped the little electric rat. This was gonna be a tough battle, especially if it's against

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  • Eor, whose fog-of-mope defense was impenetrable. Of course, the crowd loves an underdog. "Pi-ka-chu! Pi-ka-chu!" they chanted. "Pika, pika?" he asked and charged his

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  • thunderbolt attack. But, as expected, this had failed. The underdog wasn't really a pikachu. He was just a simple parrot, dressed as a rat. The opponent could help but

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  • Chose not to, as opponents often do.

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  • But when you've been betrayed, the decision becomes so much harder. All of your instincts against the lesser of two evils whither when the difference becomes negligible.

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  • But then what about the lesser of two goods? Or the lesser of two mediocres? That's right, I'm a barrista and I am determined to work as little as possible without getting

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  • fired from Starbucks. Where else can I sling overpriced coffee and scowl at the "professionals" from behind my formica and glass counter? Plus, they have good health benefits.

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  • Those "professionals" never impressed me. I usually daydreamed about pouring sugary, Italian flavor syrups all over them, and then placing them bound in the entomology lab, but

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  • I'd never be that cruel to insects. The thought of innocent bugs stuck to the backsides of prostitutes breaks my heart. I opened the can of

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  • Four Loko and poured it onto the cracked asphalt below the porch. For all of those who have gone before us, and all who are to come.

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