Today was the day. Today, I was going to

Today was the day. Today, I was going to be able to prove myself to everyone in the village. Always mocking me, Tim was going to learn today, who I am, and why one should not mess

with Christopher Walken's sadly deceased little known pet chihuahua. "He was such a little angel." Chrissie would frequently say as he blinked back tears. "He went so early."

"Well," Christopher Walkin replied, "he sure went out with a bang." Of course, it would be hard to find a small animal that lives a life consuming Mexican food that DOESN'T do that

if one crushed it with a wok. Christopher Walkin turned around and examined the remaining Mexican food. "I wonder why the

craft services operator seems to believe that I can't eat anything unless it's in burrito form? After the birthday cake burrito, I thought they'd learned how much I hate

eating candles, but no. The candle burrito sat atop my plate, and since I was at gunpoint, I had no choice but to eat it. I started slowly. It was disgusting, but what choice did I

have but to comply? Then again, who'd have thought that out off anyone who wanted to rescue him, the one who smashes the door down with an HDTV is none other than Michael Scarn?

Scarn gathered up Clive Bixby's unconscious form and stopped only to admire his

vulnerable body and his tranquil, angularly cut face. "No homo" he silently intoned to himself, as he