Finished Folds (201—220)
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3to the street, I ran through the cars like a maniac. I had about two minutes to get to
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2It was supposed to be easy, just a couple of hours of work cleaning up the website. As soon as I looked at the code, I realized that this was no ordinary
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5About three slides into the PowerPoint deck, I knew I was in trouble. Mr. Bridge locked the conference room door, and the Chairman leaned forward, his index finger
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1he..." Jim interrupted and said, "Are you going to tell us the whole movie? Is there a punch line in here somewhere?" Taking a deep breath, Moral End started again. "OK, there's
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3great hero was just another open sore into which his mother would poke her thumb. "Timmy, you'll never amount to a pile of warm shit," she'd say. It's no wonder he set out on
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7raining, the ash clouds from the volcanoes grayed the sky. It seemed like a good idea to move here, join a band, and work part time foaming lattes, but lately
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1Well, they said they were vampires, where were the capes? Hoodies just don't cut it. Anyhow, they were clients and it really didn't matter. He put his phone away and handed
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3The first item in his inbox was another rejection from the New Yorker. They had no interest in his zombie stories, zombie cartoons, or zombie theater reviews. The next message
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3except Linus, but he had withdrawn to what he called his "fortress of solitude". The Oracle smiled, having obscured the Sun. In the distance, the people began to
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2they would appreciate my recap of the situation in mime. When I was done, there was a bit of applause in the crowd below. I stepped off and, for a moment, floated in the light.
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4It's an old story. A djinn appears and offers you three wishes. If this happens to you, your best bet is to
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2mental lisp. The thought spread through the collective and he spoke: I am Locuth. Rethithtance ith futile. The bridge crew began to giggle and Wesley wet himself. The Borg
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3well within the expectations of the situation. It was a 7-11, after all, and it was 3 AM. He threw the book at me -- literally. I ducked and it hit a cop, knocking him
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4they could be developed. The road to Hell has many on-ramps, I like to say. Entering the names into the app on my iPad, I continued my task. Lust, greed, and sloth were the
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2o'clock and I needed a drink. Then, I remembered. It should be </sudo proc></get me a beer>. As I pressed ENTER, the amber liquid began to flow. Oh, blessed relief. Now I could
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3walked across the water. Raising his arms, he called out, "O, my priests. In my name, you have royally screwed the pooch. I forsake you." As Jesus turned, they
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1required two zombies, one to pour the tea and one not to pour the tea. The brains were smoked over seaweed then dried and shredded for the ritual. The most sublime
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4, gesturing him back. Handing him an old gym bag, she told him "Get your old shit together and put it in here." She took the bag of coprolites and backed out the door. She fired
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4thing Mommies and Daddies do when they love each other. But then he said, what if you love someone else's Mommy. Kids are way too smart these days.
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1and,what the heck, he was way ahead in the rankings and could afford to lose on or two more and still come in first. What was it he was supposed to cut out? "WTF, let's GO!"