Finished Folds (341—360)
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1I hid as vans with loud speakers blared, "Citizens be viligant for scofflaw. Debts must be paid!" Jackboots marched from door to door. Parking ticket?
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10unconscious body. I pretended to look at my list ignoring the stares of the other shoppers. The PA crackled, "Attention customers: Clean up in aisle 11 due to doofus. Sorry for
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3He tried to pull his arms away from the superglue. The street luge rocked slightly. "Please! hear me out!" She let the spaghetti strap slip from her shoulder and pulled the lever.
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5off of the kitchen chair and onto the table. My sister nearly fell off and I pulled her up. If we could just make it to the counter, we would avoid the lava floor completely.
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2Every hour on the top of the clock, he would drink two fingers of Absolut. Then he would write a paragraph and pace. He passed his deadline by two weeks.
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3Don't worry, she will be safe with the fairies.
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5tried to console my friend. "Maybe we should lay off the mead, how about a nice..." Pooh pulled on my felt ear and whispered, "Lishun, piggie, its thoses damned heffalumps...
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3water filled every orifice. Gills? How did I get gills? A siren spoke to me with sonar. "You are chosen. Neptune's carberator needs an overhaul." I became a sea grease monkey
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6. But when she saw her naked body touting perfume on the side of a bus or her face snarfing Slim Jims on a Jumbotron, she had regrets.
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2the Home Shopping Network. Slippered pajamas? Power crystals? Aerobic pistons? Yes please! I recited my credit card by memory and the FedEx knew me by name. My addiction would
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4Some people called him 'chia pet' or 'pot head.' His grass hair had a distinct cerebral high. When the feds knocked on his door,
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7were purposeful. Every hour on the top of the clock, he would drink two fingers of Absolut. Then he would write a paragraph and pace. He passed his deadline by two weeks.
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2nononono. This cant be happening... Shut it off, just shut it off. Shut it... Not that dial, the other one! THAT ONE! Counter-clockwise! Argghhh!
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1, I paused. The words from my Apple Mindguide played back on my retina. I tried to remember a day when all communication wasn't telepathic. A ad memory jingle rang in my ear.
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2MAAAA!!! I'm writing with friends! Close the door, you're letting natural light in. (Now where was I?) ... Balthazar the Untested looked down the slope of skulls. (that's good.)
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7I poured myself a glass of orange juice and it flew up to the ceiling. My eggs and bacon were hovering. Pushing them down, I remembered, must pay gravity bill.
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1The girl told her mom about the dream at breakfast. "I rolled the corpse in plastic and dumped it a near-by landfill." Her mom pointed a fork. "No more Encyclopedia Brown for you."
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2It was loaded with tupperware containers each labeled, "Do Not Open Until February." He growled. It was December and he, Mr. Bear, had insomnia.
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4he was the inventor of the pińata and would have wanted it that way. The mourners lined up in blindfolds and took whacks at the dear departed. The funeral band played
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3God was getting so tired of naming animals. Why did make so many beetles? Baronsloth, Girlycheese, Duchessbucket, Frank...