Finished Folds (661—680)
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5I find antiques sooth me. I can spend hours browsing old license plates, oil cans, and Hummel figurines. I particularly like to lick the paint.
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3"It's quiet... too quiet." he said as he tripped over the cat.
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5He dusted off his Easy Reader togs and hitched a ride to Dutch Pennsylvania. Looking for an untethered Amish miss, Morgan Freeman strode into the corn. "Out-of-sightcous!"
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4An hour later, no one showed up. The pizza was getting cold. The floor boards rumbled. He looked at his invites and realized everyone whooping it up with Mrs. Fish in 317, not 417.
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5The colors slowly oozed out of the frame and onto the desk. I dropped the picture as the colors swirled closer to my hand.
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5I woke up the next morning and looked at my face. My acne was completely cleared! Word to Zit Zapper! But then I noticed my nose was gone.
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3I HEREBY RESOLVE: to in everyday and in every way follow by the example of the FoldingStory moral code. 1. Be kind to lesser creatures unless they're edible.
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1"Happy New Year!" said the waif sloshing the champagne around and tipping his top hat. 2014 sat drunk in a corner leaning on his scythe "Just you wait..."
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7"Oh, don't be so scared, it's really very easy and not that steep at all. Watch me."
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2She addressed me literally. Late last night, someone took a phillips screwdriver to the back of my skull and I involuntarily gave a piece of my mind. "Tony? are you even listening?
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8h air traffic and satellite television. And lo, we were sore afraid, for on this day, true believer, the Flying Spaghetti Monster was born,
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3It started out slowly, words became illegible. People would drop things that would never be found again. Childhood friends would appear. As the dreams merged further in reality,
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5The jolly old elf stared into the fire. "We were still in Saigon. Blitzen was on point and Dancer had the artillery. We were after Col. Kurtz. He had been assigned to 'naughty.'
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10Too much thinking." Winston hastily poured water from a house plant down Doris ear canal. "Mjsjhfu! Mjs... Marsupials! What's up with that?" Hardly a puff of smoke from Doris now.
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5ermined, I brought forth my scroll to the high hierophant. She adjusted her pince-nez. "Not a great year for corn." "Our quarter was down for sacrifices." I pleaded.
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1a Snappy tie, turns a boy into a swell guy." She smiled through gritted teeth and held the product to the TV camera. She was the headliner for Mercury Theater on the Air, but now
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3He used to get a Christmas card every year from the jolly old elf, but now their relationship was strained. "He never writes." muttered Krampus.
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3I send texts that say "U ROK." On Saturdays, I send flowers with purple poetry. Thursday is game night. I hope we can get more intimate soon. I love myself.
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3is your platitude. Let a smile be your umbra, (or is it umbrella?) Remember you need to squeeze a few lemons to make an omelet. So get cracking!
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7. Chaz came down from his mountain base. He warmed up his Amiga 1000, sipped his chai and did a spit take. Fifth place? A tear rolled down his eye. Procrastination was his nemesis.