7 Folds
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3
"...and that's how you do the Hamster Dance!" I proclaimed, an awkward smile on my face as I faced the angry crowd. I was never allowed to DJ for my friend's parties again. -
1
restraint in giving me the most savage beating of my life. Go to the haunted house they said. Make fun of the decorations they said. This was one of the worst ideas I've ever had.
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4
The patient has an impossible body type and is far too thin for her height The Patient has been admitted after having compulsions to respond to partying requests with "aww aww yea"
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4
Mr Arthur reclined back in his office chair, and realized the consequences of his actions. He then pressed the big red button. You know, the one that makes everything go Boom. End.
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2
my Supersized Big Mac Combo Meal with two extra orders of fries, the largest Slushie they had, 12 mini pies, and an an entire box of Chips Ahoy. Halfway through my meal, the bench
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6
I, as my arch nemesis, Feng Shui, stood there in his undies. I put his panda disguise aside, and the epic battle began in the middle of P.F. Chang's. Onlookers looked in awe as
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0
The Produce Aisle and declare that all fruits should be treated as equals. Little Red Delicious knew the day apples would be respected would be near when the ghost of Steve Jobs
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1
I backed away slowly from the woman. She was really starting to freaking me out. Despite what pop songs will tell you, "Shut up and dance with me" is not an acceptable pick-up line
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4
I looked at the contestant, disgusted. I looked at my fellow judges at the cooking competition. Patrica nearly puked. Brian did. "So, um, could you explain your choice to include
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3
I couldn't help but to feel stupid. I had been reading the username as "Slim White Man" for over five years. I nearly broke by keyboard on my head as I slammed it onto the desk.
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3
Gertrude panicked, hiding the tiny people, crawling all over her body from her lover. But it was too late. "You have humans?!" He bellowed, drowning out Gertrude's sobbing.
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11
Give a hand to our researcher, Bob Simons, author of the Bestselling book: "Worlds Beyond Our Own FoldingStory" and "Why Our Lives are Weird and Disconnected, and other Answers"
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5
making coffee and pancakes in the RV kitchen. "Leo, what the heck are ya doin' makin' me breakfast?!" The lion tamer shouted. The lion's reaction was even more uncanny than thelast
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4
Various Mickey Mouse merchandise. What the penguins want with the stolen merch is currently unknown, but our investigative reporter, Jim, is on the case. Back to you, Jim.
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5
"Jamie, I have a great idea for a myth!" The mustached walrus gave a tired "Hm-hm"t. "If you dig all the way through earth, would you see stars?" Jamie handed him a spade and left
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12
I will say the very meaning of life. I will discuss the very reason why we are here, and what we're doing and why we're doing it. I will put all this responsibility on the next guy
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4
"Look, I'm sorry, I just really like swords!" I stammered. "You killed 19 people!" My friend, Frank, bellowed. I couldn't help it. They were in the wrong place at the wrong time.
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7
The protesters gathered outside the palace, chanting "The End is HERE!" many people had no idea what the large crowd was doing, It was a great day to be on Alderaan! The Birds were
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5
I am a Fruit Loop in a world of Cheerios. Except in high school, where everyone else is a strange, bubbling concoction of high fructose syrup and artificial flavor and color.
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final print of the new advertisement for batteries. Mr Blakeney knew that sex sells products, so what better way to sell double A batteries than