4 Folds
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and sat through her entire collection of chick flicks, hoping the sight of a steamy Hollywood hunk would return feeling to her groin. To her horror, it was -
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אבל גוגל תרגם אכל אותה
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diesel-powered generator I kept for emergencies such as this, filled it up and turned it on. My head foggy with arousal and anticipation I held up the power plug and
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about sticking things in male vampire vaginas, except the people on foldingstories.com. What a pile of degenerates. But besides them, no one cares
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stole the other person's pants from the floor. That delicious tiger-skin pleather is finally mine! I struggled to put them on as the owner pursued me down the street
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sandalwood incense and candles I had lit to give my hut some ambiance, and that is why I ran screaming in flames through the commune. By the time they put me out I had no body hair
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blowing your nose with a vagina. Which is what they had to do five minutes later when they felt a bit sniffly. All in all it was not a good night.
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, stuck his arm in the hole and began his famed ventriloquist act with the cigar dangling from the corner of his mouth. The surviving poodles were enraptured by his ability to say
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So I thought what the hell, stuck the glasses in my eyes and started experimenting. Long story short, I invented a cocktail I call Red Eye Conjunctivitis! It's two parts vodka and
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possession by the spirit of Al Swearagan. He took a new sheet of paper and wrote very clearly, his hand only juddering slightly, 'COCKSUCKERS
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turned eldritch dark god, Madden is summoned by spinning counter-clockwise three times in front of a mirror in a dark room and screaming "FOOTBAAAALL!" He grants wishes in exchange
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and having one huge nostril did wonders for his long-time passion for tuba-playing. He went on X-Factor (though they made him wear a paper bag over his head) and would have won if
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When he was found dead in his cottage with wounds in his wrists and a sharpened lead pencil stuck through his left ankle, they passed it off as suicide. The detective knew better,
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and having hordes of razor-teethed slavering hell hounds wanting to catch the same frisbee as the players makes Ultimate Frisbee interesting to watch for a change.
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people stopped paying attention and he vanished in a puff of meth. But legends say Sheen remains in the sky with his twelve buffalo, meth and explosives, as the star constellation
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the eighties in an alternate reality where insects ruled the earth. The horrifying sound of synth crickets filled my ears. The only thing that would save humanity was Dolly Patron
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anyone with sense could have told them holding a marathon around Cape Canaveral during a satellite launch was a damn silly idea. But a runner's head got stuck in the rocket and
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due to a poor choice of victim, the vampire caught the Hipster Indie Virus. He was doomed to waste away in a hospital bed covered with scarves and thick-framed glasses, unless
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there were 19 men speed-dating alongside me and only one woman. It all became clear when she leaned forward and, hoping for a glimpse of her rack, I stared down her shirt and saw
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cricket is a hell of a sport. Non-Americans mock their football, but you don't play that for five days and still have a chance of only getting a draw. That's why I took the bat and