Finished Folds (61—77)
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3escaped one day, never to be seen again. The Times called it Baby Roanoke. "Oh well, I still have most of them" said Sarah JP Dark. Her 15 remaining baby girls began plotting to
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5He knew he'd make millions off his screaming-steak-tree. Unfortunately so did the King of Meat’s two-timing ex-wife, the Duchess of Tofu. That night, she snatched it as revenge for
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1"There are monsters everywhere!" Jorge pleaded. "Little creepy creatures wearing tiny top hats who sing the blues! Also pop songs. You gotta believe me!" Only Rosa believed because
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4she left her keys at home. Meanwhile Alice remained oblivious to the fact she just killed an innocent witch "Maybe I'll have falafel for lunch" she thought skipping to the Emerald
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2"Alrighty, let's get started, shall we? This seminar is 'How to Live Forever.' First things first, (and I want to underscore the importance of this, people), don't die. Second,
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6The Sea Witch's own Poseidon adventure turned upside-down the day she met Wanda the Hussy. The sea god was hers, and by George, she would have him! She retreated to her lair to
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6refused to serve now-underaged Ray(Isaac), Art(Ray), and Isaac(Art). "You fascist," Ray(Isaac) said, "I got my JD when you were in adult-diapers!" 1994 was cruel. Art(Ray) thought
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7But she kept her space camp dreams secret, pressurized, festering, until they finally manifested as a mutant astronaut hell-bent on murder, NASA-style. Her dad didn't expect to be
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3Putin thrashed the girl's board asunder in one swift motion. "I do NOT lose." In that moment, he was 7 again in Leningrad, Tommy Ulanov pressing his face to the ground. "I will
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5cantaloupe!" I swore, as any courageous fruitarian would. In a rush of honeyed adrenaline, I resolved to return to my criminal roots and trick from some carnivores into eating a
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5Not if you like e coli. Good thing I did. To hell with my spleen, Dr. Hamm could harvest all my organs for all I cared, so long as he said hi to me in trigonometry. But he didn't.
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5"Yes you may," said the administrator. "It's not so much a study as it is a theme park ride, really. And you're at least this tall, so you qualify." She giggled and pulled out a
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8A tailess donkey brayed from the pews, "I see the light! I beg salvation!" Brother Francis nodded. "And what brave soul among you will deliver this lamb to the fold?" The anaconda
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5travel brochure." "I don't care if it wins the Pulitzer," the evil homonculus said, "you will burn it or your mother will die. There is no other way." As it turned out, there was.
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0moonshine, poured the jet black liquid on his stack of papers and writings, and dropped a match. The moonshine fire was a slow dead burn, but it did the job. He was now free from
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3Lo and behold, it worked! One by one, the unenlightened slobs in town began to see the virtue of The Brotherhood. I thought the Prophet would be happy with my work, but he just
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8Six years had passed since Benjamin's death. For years in a quiet obsession, Sarah tracked her fiance's killer. Now, finally, across the ballroom floor stood that very lizard man.