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Acting out in real life a childrens fairytail

  • Acting out in real life a childrens fairytail isn't something I usually do. It was just a bit of fun, honest, but it turned into one of the most scary things I've ever done. It

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  • required I build a split-level gingerbread house. Do you know how hard it is to create sugar shingles that won't melt in the rain? Then I went on Craig's list in search of a crone.

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  • It was a lot easier than finding waterproofed sugar shingles. I just placed an add in personals reading:"Seeking 80+ practicing wiccan tennant for split-level g-bread, working oven

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  • , overlooks haunted woods." It took three real estate agents to fend off hungry children while prospective buyers toured the candied rooms. The septic system

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  • was made of sour patch kids, red vines and hollowed out jaw breakers. The Candy House needed some work but the buyers had HGTV and watched boatloads of

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  • illegal Oompa Loompan immigrants doing shoddy work on the Candy House, lewdly leering over ladies, hiding every time the cops drove by, and not speaking English. The buyers were on

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  • to him. They lowered their offer, realizing they could sweeten the deal on the Candy House if they could get rid of the Oompa Loompa subcontractors and hire Hansel and Gretel to

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  • build the Candy House. After all, child labor laws were non-existant in the Enchanted Forest. So Hansel and Gretel got busy while the Oompa Loompas sulked nearby. Hansel and Gretel

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  • joined the Candy House Union which was in cahoots with Don Gummi Bear of the Enchanted Forest Mafia. An Oompa Loompas went missing and people suspect

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  • ed foul play since the Oompas had crossed the picket lane and there was bad blood. But nobody ever thought it was the tooth fairy that did it. Nobody ever suspects the Tooth Fairy.

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1 Comments

  1. sundancer Dec 04 2012 @ 04:46

    GREAT STORY! :-D

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