"Forty miles as the crow flies, my back paw!"

"Forty miles as the crow flies, my back paw!" thought Melville. The crow in question meandered from one empty corn field to the next. How was a mouse supposed to visit his brother

in the country with all these vast, open spaces? Melville the mouse considered stopping to ask for directions to his brother Montaine's homestead. The crow was either lost or drunk

dialing old flames. Melville the mouse tried to get the crow's attention, but the crow cried on the phone calling, "Why? Why?!?!?" The mouse was lost and confused.

The crow was dazed and repetitive...and apparently also heartbroken. Melville the mouse began a cheesey apology, but then simply hung up. This online dating service wasn't working

. His dates were emotionally incompatible & he was allergic to feathers. But worst of all, he was their major prey! Melville the mouse decided to go Old School. He walked into bar

Mr. Bat himself, took over and sang "Three Blind Mice". Melville understood the joke. Hitman Anders had completely changed his lifestyle. Now he was, like Melville, a mouse. Karma,

now Ahab's First Mate, kept a tight ship for Ahab. He could not abide there being any mice on his ship let alone mice that used to be Bat & Melville. He called ALL HANDS ON DECK, &

to his dismay, the only hands left to get on deck were the tiny mice hands of none other than Bat and Melville. Ahab's first mate danced about, trying to stomp them, but he made

history when his performance brought the judges on "Sailors Got Talent" to tears.Had his frenetic stompings not made holes below decks & sank the ship...you got lucky, Baryshnikov!