The carrion birds fought halfheartedly for

The carrion birds fought halfheartedly for the barely edible flesh of Ronald Stedman. He'd been mostly chemicals and electrolytes swirling through a barely human body for years.

That's what 40 years of working at Wal Mart will do to a guy. He shouldn't have eaten that the Wal Mart cafeteria for so long. But little Tatiana worked the slurpy machine and he

was fascinated by that thing. She'd hold her vessel under the spout and the contraption would fill it up with the nectar of the gods. He didn't know which

pale ale to try first! Abe liked his beer hoppy and his women busty.

Or maybe it was the other way around - Abe liked his beer busty and his women hoppy? Honestly, it could go either way. Abe's a strange fellow. Like the time he

went to the theater. Next thing he know, he was shot. It was okay because the play was crappy anyway. But he was sorry that he wouldn't get home to

As any cow will tell you, a grazing wound hurts but cuddent be fatal. When he got to Emergency, he wrote Pasturized on the form, and waited. Eventually, he bailed and left. He herd

about the story with too many bovine puns in it and entered them all in a contest. Did he win? Did he heck - no pun in ten did, and so he got all huffy and climbed on top of the

soap box and washed his mouth out. No need to be down in the mouth about it.