Sal initially wanted to open an "Ancient

Sal initially wanted to open an "Ancient Roman" themed restaurant, but when the backers got whiff of his plans for "Dormice Poppers" and learned that everything would be covered in

volcanic ash because it would be located at the foot of Vesuvius "The Pompean" got the boot. But when Zimmerman heard about it he sponsored Sal's restaurant himself. Opening night

-mares happened all at the same time on Opening Night. Worst case scenarios and repeated mishaps caused Sal's restaurant to

attract hoards of pessimists, who enjoyed bad meals and terrible service better than anything else. They were poor tippers too! Sal's restaurant became known far and wide for

Sal's Salacious Salisbury Steak served with sides of Sufferin Succotash and Succulent Swamp Squash. Everyone, absolutely everyone, hated it and Sal's had never been busier. S

oon, Sal skipped solemnly to Singapore seemly to avoid the siege. Surprisingly, Spaniards spoke so highly of Sal's Salacious Salisbury Steak that Sal saw Spain as

our hissing snake narrator slithered away, replaced by Sylvester the Cat: "Sal's carne asada was a smashing success in southern Seville. Sufferin' succotash, these s's seem

so subtle, somewhat strange. I suddenly slipped sideways and slid straight toward Sunset Street. Some sedans swerved, screeching shrilly, scraping streetlights. "Sorry!"

"Oh, Ambika!" they chanted, "We're down on our knees. We're begging you please to stop folding. Oh Ambika! Oh Ambika! Pleeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeese!!!!!!