is the ball going inside the net yes yes yes please go in please go in suddenly , something a space ship came into the stadium and took the players and ran away i was

They were sold out of tickets for the matinee of "Wicked", but some guy on the street sold me front-row seats to "Puffed Wheat! The Musical" for dirt cheap. I hope Marlene

"Who's the guy who invented work? I oughta punch him in the butt." Our anti-hero slurred angrily as he tripped out of bed.

He was a fledgling namedropper looking to score. And so, when his sister's husband's grandfather, a minor civic leader, suddenly passed away, he knew this was his chance at fame.

People who couldn't see the backward just never would. It was unheard of for as long as Getheil could remember and he was there at Emergence. Then they found the math; Kurt Gödel.

Nancy Drew took a long drag of the joint and handed it to one of the Hardy Boys. "Work's been slow," she said. "Us, too." She pushed a Candyland playpiece across the map thoughtful

Luella Maple Thorpe had been cheated of the ultimate American pedigree. A Mayflower ancestor. Instead, Jebulun Maple had opted for a cheaper cabin on the Speedwell. The trip was

Squeak squelch squeak squelch - with one wet and one dry foot, Jim made his way irritably through the immaculate corridors. He had just been

The 13 Helgas churned in anger, filling Osh Kosh with sounds that were whey too loud. See, they hated margarine. Corn oil is for wimps, they'd mutter. Real men like saturated

:Hi A voice came out of no where. :Hi?? You say. :Beware of strange monsters: The voice says again. You open your eyes. You find yourself in a strange room filled with

The local fire department has recently aquired a new truck. The siren makes the sound of wailing children, and the tires are made completely of jelly donuts. Recently,

There once was a man named Joe who faithfully bought a lottery ticket every day. One day Joe's persistence finally paid off and he got lucky!

My psychology project was to interview people appearing in viral videos so I sought out the kid who said "I like turtles". This is a transcript of my interview. Me: "Hi Jonathan".

And Superman grabbed Lois and they kissed. Then he said, "You know we can never have sex because when I ejaculate, the yellow sun gives my kiegel muscles super strength and

Along with a good portion of the country, I am still unemployed.

A big pale lantern hangs in the sky. I feel a lust to howl at the moon, and I'm not alone. AARRROOOOOOOOOOO AAAAROOOOOOOO AAAROOOOOOOOOOO

I didn't always have this desire to rip everything up and throw it at the cat, but certainly these last fews days it's been pretty much my entire raison d'etre. Those bloody cats.

It was an unlit and tempestuous period between sunset and sunrise, when ey sauntered inside. I was imbibing solitarily and quite ebrious. I gazed into eir optic opening and beheld

He squeezed the pimple. It was deep under the skin. It wasn't ready. His eyes watered, he wanted to cry out

“Oh no” escaped my lips. Suddenly I knew what I was doing for dinner that night. I looked over at the present next to the door nervously.