Steven's mother stroked his hair and sang his favourite lulllaby until he fell asleep. Then the sandman came, and Steven

He was a radiant natural for quantum shamanistics, sans drugs, sans patches, sans nanites - but his inner music was too beneficial, so they put him down. He gasped, "The tide rises

"Get back in the gorilla suit," I directed. I could already smell the Oscar. "Action!" Gorilla: My darling, at long last, I've returned. But I have strict orders to eliminate

I put on my teeth and sharpened my glasses and looked at the long potato. It was really long. I figured there must be competitions for this kind of thing so I

Herbert was relaxing on the patio on a warm July evening, enjoying his gin & tonic, when suddenly the stones beneath him gave way and he found himself plunging, still in his chair

"Stress can cause sleepwalking, which is exercise, so stress is good for you. Looks like someone just solved health." Anna had a quill-wielding scribe record her every word. Genius

A shark is a large fish, and does not move hydrologically in the same way that say, an inflatable child's toy does, but I wasn't in the frame of mind to tell the difference when

I'M BATMAN! or I thought I was. My butler keeps telling me I am this Bruce guy and that I should unlock the broom closet and take my meds. My thoughts are a bit...I'M BATMAN!

Then she tasted Gengrich's hair. Vanilla Icing. His head really was a giant Cupcake.

Men in tights jumping and twirling around stage with sugar plum fairies. It's Nutcracker season again. Every year I suffer through it. The only good part of the whole damn show is

I like skittles, and kittens.

As 45th President The Donald's first act was to fire Congress for incompetence. "But you can't do that Mr. President." "Why not? I'm the CEO and they're incompetent. Am I right?"

it was taking longer than expected. After the change , Dave thought himself immune to impatience, but it was taking too long. his telescopic range had grown but

Beer was no medicine, this I knew. But the night was young, I was heartbroken, and I didn't give a damn. I would drink the town dry if only if meant ridding my thoughts of his

Oh the goose and the geese, the moose and the meese, I am loose with the lease, I drink booze with the bees.

Sid was acepted as a law student at Oxford University but he couldn't get accommodation on campus since the rooms were full. He looked up different student websites hoping to find

Walking down a hallway

I was going to a fifa soccer match, when i got there i saw many people running out of the soccer match club, when i look closely, i saw a a group of witches throwing pumpkin bomb

It's a mad, mad, mad, mad, mad, mad scientist who creates a giant robot to defend the world against the Asian Indians because he thinks they're all hippies.

"A poltergeist is nothing but a juvenile trickster determined to plague credulous adults," said Joe Quarter as a teacup smashed against his forehead. Sally tried to look innocent.