I once owned a horse by the name of Gulliver. Best damn horse around these parts. She'd dance. I mean, honest to God, dance if you started playing "Hotel California" around her.

I sipped my tomato soup thoughtfully and peered out the window at the darkened street,comforted in knowing that all I held dear was ensconsed on our snug brick house on Elm Street.

...and my dad, he never showed me that he loved me." Ted weeped a little. Dabbed his moist eyes with tissue. The therapists chair swiveled-Genghis Khan sat there. His piercing eyes

Fresh out of the shower, I admired my girth in the foggy mirror. Middle age had made me fat with rolls of flesh and the kind of rippled cellulite flesh I used to make fun of when I

In Loughborough, a town in the Charnwood borough of Leicestershire, lived Vaughn Colcolough who had a tough 20 yr. hiccough & though he tried many a remedy they were all for nought

Jim had a fish. He named it Bob. He was small. He was a goldfish. He got it for his birthday. Which is what he wanted. He was happy. He asked his mom. How she knew

the big top circus tent floating across the water is not what it seems.

Todays the day that will change my life and I am ready, it has been a long time coming and nothing will stop me, no longer encumbered I have the means and vision to complete it.

There was a girl with a puppy. This puppy was very sweet. He liked to play fetch in the water. He was a big dog, but acted like a lap dog when it came to people's laps.

I was hot on Chaz's tail (um, so to speak) but SlimWhitman was way ahead and MoralEnd had nearly lapped me. Worse, PurpleProf was coming on strong, folding like her life depended o

She got up a 5am to prepare lunches for the kids. Today was gluten-free free-range chicken salad in sprout wraps served sushi-style in Etsy designed bento boxes.

Tippity witchity.

I discovered a loophole in the rules of polite society & started using a laptop bag as a manpurse. Trouble was, I could never find anything in there. One time at Victor's Surprise

When the Elder Gods moved in to the vacant house on Cherry Lane, Mable Klump had been the first brave soul to welcome them, cheesy broccoli casserole in hand. Her sanity blasted

All governments suffer a recurring problem: Power attracts pathological personalities

"Tojo, I've a feeling we're not in Osaka anymore," said Emperor Hirohito.

Teddy scuttled down the stairs Christmas morning, his hearts full of excitement & joy. What he found under the tree, however, made this the WORST Christmas EVER!

The note ended with, "Why dear sir, one could hardly find a sillier celebrity than you." He stared at the paper, trembling. "Sillier celebrity?" He thought, why he was the MOST

Alright. Let me sure I got the facts straight. Our suspect is a) Alive "check" b) born in the 80's "check" c) lives upstairs "check" and d) likes cheese "check". Well, Officer Plod

I remember the Eighties. Driving my '73 VW bug back and forth to Baltimore cranking The Police up on the radio. If i knew then that someday I'd be hanging out with Sting and