Flotilla Bathos was languishing in the windowless desiderium one morning when the butler brought in her daily salmanazar of wine. "How is your prolapse today, madam?" "Chives, what

"GET THAT BIRD OUT OF THE OVEN!"

My Bucket List consists of significant buckets in my life including a photo and a modest description. Bucket 1: Red, plastic, oval opening with a convenient metal handle. Bucket 2:

Eros, the impossibly beautiful and terrifying God, was sitting in the garden of Psyche's palace. Under his naked feet the path of opals, amethysts and pearls glistened in the sun.

The rain fell, noiseless. I hadn't even noticed that it was raining until he put an umbrella over my head. I knew he wouldn’t ask what was wrong and I wasn't planning on offering

Clara slept in a semi-recumbant crouch on the floor, unable to get comfortable. Tired of her life as an overnight paralegal, she desired escape. What was so pressing that it requir

Doug'ys Dad done died doin' Doris Dilkins during Demsicola's Derby Days.

Dirk was so attached to Christine that when she met an untimely end in a car accident, he was heartbroken. At the funeral in the junkyard (he called it the car cemetery) his eulogy

Great ideas are often hidden behind a dark shadow of conspiracy theories. I saw a tear roll down his cheek. My father had kept a fragment of a manuscript in his library under

Oh, I'm not a professional stripper. No, I'm just doing this to get through medical school. I just do this for a little extra money. You know...to pay for my books and lab fees.

It was a great beach day in the Pacific Northwest, 80 degrees, not a cloud in the sky. She packed a good book, cheese, smoked oysters, crackers and thermos full of ice and wine. At

The elevator doors slid shut behind Davey, as he perused the panel. '3,2,1,G' it stated reasonably, 'B, SB' sensibly, and then 'SSB, SSSB, Centre of the Earth'. "Gosh!" Davey ejacu

one day lord torettes was just stabbing Russo and stole all his grease to cook his chicken in

The sound of kids laughing and playing in the park pisses me off with envy. The only reminders I have of my childhood are stretch marks, herpes and chronic

This is worth it for the kitty attack.

The gods had been sleeping when Delores got the job at Bean, Bean & Krump.

There he was, sitting on top of the pavement in front of the bus stop..

Although euros have a light hint of cresote, nothing can compare to the smoky aroma of a burning hundred dollar billl.

No one puts my ideas into practice, which is good. I'm sick of perfect ideas being proven wrong by "applications." So, when I say idle things like, "The best way to please women is

It was like looking into an abyss. It radiated by its absence. Your senses would get sucked into the very blackness of nothing. I didn't know a mood ring could get that color.