Ollie looked up as Stanley crept up the stairs, well aware that his time was nearly up. Stan gave him his best steely stare. Ollie's body tensed up, as his eyes darted around. He

The General hit the white board with his riding crop. "There is no tactical nuke without the word, TACT! Get into your pea brains that the bombing should be subtle! Like a pillow,

Simply Irresistible. It is a rediculous song but I was listening to it hoping that somehow it might rub off on me and let me get into her pants because

Jamboni ran through the tunnels of his subterranean home as it began to crumble around him. As he broke out into the surface and left his dwelling forever behind, he realized what

Dealing out hands of multi-colored metallic discs to a table of nervous participants, the steel-faced gambling robot came to rest. It then blinked its single red light three times,

James took a bite of his freshly-unwrapped fast food cheeseburger and began to chew it, but nearly choked when a woman's face suddenly smooshed against the window in front of him.

It's a kind of disease really. And I'm seeing a therapist about it now. I guess I realized I had a problem when I was texting my girlfriend while driving the bus

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They lay in bed. He said 'I'm going to make you the happiest person in the world!' 'Oh,' she said 'I'll miss you. When are you planning to leave?'

"Hi, I'm Chris Hansen from Dateline NBC. Why don't you have a seat over there?" The strange man said to me. "Hey dude Im here for LargeLouie69, ya seen him?" I said with a smile

I unlocked the deadbolt and peered out into the blackness past the screen door. Something had made that noise. It was cold and I was trying to talk myself out of investigating but

i grabbed the rake and whipped it across the baby's face. Well it didn't stop crying. The door opened and in ran

My brother was returning from deployment on mars and needed a ride. My wife had told me that I was kindly offering, no matter what I said. So here I was, standing in the lunar rain

Whoouh. I pushed back from the delivery Chinese-splattered table, grabbed a fortune cookie and limped to the couch, spent. Cracking the cookie, I pushed some shards in my mouth and

Avery always knew what he wanted. He was just that kind of person. That is why, at the young age of nineteen, he knew he wanted to be with his boyfriend Jason forever. So Jason now

I am an aromiologist. Miss your early school years? I can mix a batch of chalk dust, mimeograph fluid, and slight whiff of industrial cleanser. First love? Cherry Lipsmacker,

When Amy finally woke up in the hospital after a week-long coma, she discovered an engagement ring on her left hand. She felt desperately in love but unfortunately, amnesia

Ever since my mom sat me down and told me that my father was an anonymous sperm donor I have been trying to find the other half of me that's always been a mystery. All I had was

The young girl was used to dark places so the narrow and damp corridor did not frighten her. She felt her way down, her hands running along the sides of the jagged walls until

Sometimes when I brush my teeth I think I can hear the cavities die. I can hear their wails and screams as the listerine incinerates them. I feel sorry for them. That's why I