His bite was mighty and he kept his ship a-tidy. Dan Betward- lobster Fisherman extraordinaire, well, there was undoubtedly no doubting the man's flair to snare a good crustacean.

she put my hand down her pants and then she......

I saw my cat eat a black water vole leaving nothing but its green spleen. That vole is an endangered species. Should I shop my cat for illegal between meal snacks?

He pursed his lips in the dark and let out a silent whistle. It was the moment Tim had been waiting for. Angela removed her T-shirt and two luminiscent Areola shook free.

i felt like stabbing something in my eyes. The hot scalding iron bar seemed perfect.

"Is this legal?" "Oh yes. You've been traded to [chain restaurant x] across the street for a burger flipping prospect and a bag of buns. Now turn in your uniform." My dirty nametag

Flower 1 concluded, "She loves me"; Flower 2 concluded, "She loves me not." It seems even the One Mind all flowers share is susceptible to doublethink. My dystopian flower garden

Brunhilda put down her fork. "Why are you wearing a stupid hat?" she asked her husband Jerry. "It helps me think." Her marriage vows hadn't mentioned how to deal with stupid hats

I walked down the street with him and all that was on my mind was making him love me. I could tell that he really wanted to get something good out of me and that was just what I

It's a dreary Sunday afternoon, and Martha has been starring at a blank screen for two hours.

Perhaps yea well perhaps I should have but, you know, I'm not some kind of, you know, and anyway, where were you? Where were you when this was all going on and it all happened?

"What of the Toad?" he asked. A reasonable question considering the situation he found himself in: a green gloppy soup decorated with lillypads filled the bath and

The night was colder than I expected, but I suppose that's what you get for walking barefoot in the snow.

I feel guilty because I have a conscience, but my conscience also says I did the right thing.

There's this site which might be just what you're looking for. Some surprisingly fresh Rabelaisian humor is to be found but inappropriate writing does go on. Don't say I didn't war

"Later," said Angela Merkel huskily, "mit der whip und die kinky Bavarian boots." Obama, listening in on his secret red phone couldn't help giggling. "Who's she talking to?" he ask

Gaston sucked his biro. He really wanted to sign the 'Don't Touch My Whore' petition, but what if his wife found out?

Constable Plod pointed at the smoking gun. "Bollocks! This is not a smoking gun! It's a

"Punishment run these in a high-school rallies." Tribec reads, the three contestants try to think of the Jeopardy question, Phil taps in, blurts out, "

I eat reckless for breakfast; throw spoons across rooms and pop shrooms like balloons. I'm an omelet of lust. Bacon and cheddar, for worse or for better, I'll unleash my Beretta