"True passion can blind a seer's eyes & oblivion reveals the honest of lies," Meg thought. Her head felt light and her brain lit up the night. She was high, coughing up insight.

Ryu looked at his fallen opponent. He knew that he was a champion and that he would be abused as a Capcom icon from that point on.

The master placed the food on the dog's nose and said, "Staaaaaaayyyyy." The dog's eyes went cross-eyed and he thought, this is the last straw and he

When it rained, it reminded him of his childhood. The boat. Being chubby. Basically, misery.

They might have "The Running of the Bulls" in Pamploma Spain, but in Hammond, Wisconsin they have the "Running if the Llamas,"

An expectant hush fell amongst the Senators as Apollonius, his purple-trimmed toga billowing behind him, strode out into the center of the chamber. "Citizens," he cried,

There was that damn noise again! I pulled out my power drill and made another hole in the drywall. It was like a smoke alarm beep followed by a skittering sound. I searched for the

He'd been alive for thousands of years. He was a vampire. He'd accumulated the kind of wealth that makes gods envious. But he lost it all in the housing bubble and now

She took a snapshot of her privates and sent it to Rick Warren in Uganda. However Rick left his cellphone with

He let go of the shark's fin, which an instant later exploded. Shoved upward by the shockwave, he was intercepted by a passing outboard motor, snarling his scuba gear. It sputtered

After the Great Atomic Cleansing all that were left was a new strain of human. They were cancer-proof and able to generate their food from the sun like plants. In that time

Pulsing mindlessly in the deep, the little jellyfish made its way towards the swimmers, its tentacles collecting food as it went. As it approached the giant, swim-suit covered

Lewis, Hathaway and Mothra made their way across the quad to Professor Wilkinson's offices. He offered them tea but Mothra was overly particular and so instead, after a long pause,

"And you will bow down to me and you will rejoice in my teaching." The man opened his eyes and looked up. He was certainly mad, or so I imagined. His crooked smile, his silly hat,

The zombie Eloi advanced toward the citadels of the Morlocks, Tupperware and Frisbees dropping from their mindless yet beautiful hands. The Eloi did not have nutrition in mind,

I was just minding my own business reading some online letters to Playboy when I clicked on an Ad & ended up here. 'This story will end after 10 lines'? Is this some kind of kinky

Santa is Satan, dontcha know. Think about it. Both wear red. Both like horned animals. Both enjoy extreme temperatures. And both want to be the center of attention at Xmas.

After I'd received my neighbor returned to me from selling him on eBay, the car wash's genie mascot explained his master was the car wash owner. I plotted to earn his wishes for my

He retreated back to his hotel room like hermit crab. He couldn't wait to put the cigarette out, shower off the offensive tobacco stink. Hunter S. Thompson was a health nut, public

Whoouh. I pushed back from the delivery Chinese-splattered table, grabbed a fortune cookie and limped to the couch, spent. Cracking the cookie, I pushed some shards in my mouth and