Black bark gives you fire ash. You give worms to mother. I heard old man spit. This is what I pull not that.

I realized the only way to reclaim my manhood would be to report the two military drones to his and her superiors for their illegal substance abuse, but contacting them was harder

Having the reputation in college as "The Guy Who Eats A Lot Of Pizza" is not quite a feat, but it might be an accomplishment. My discarded crusts spilled over on my overdue work

Let's talk about something important. Head light flashing. Think of all the things that come to mind when someone flashes their headlights at you & I mean the real deal, not a euph

Please please please don't mention New Zealand in the following story.

She had begged and plead that he go to a synagogue so the demon attacks stop finally. But he had never wanted to go, so she drove him there and got out of the car with him.

Why, when I was your age, young feller, I trudged 5 miles to school in the snow and ice. And we didn't have nothin' like them fancy computers you young 'uns have nowadays. We were

Selfie-cam™ fits snuggly over your skull & the carbon fiber mount allows the lightweight camera to hover just above your head keeping your face in sharp focus. You're online 24/7!

"I want my beard groomed. I was told this was the place?" The stylist gave my bare face a quizzical look. I made a clip motion at hip level."The stylist deadpanned, "I don't trim

You gotta check this out, I said to no one in particular in the crowded room as I hiked up my shirt to show off my

I... am ... tired.... 1 am rolls again around a night third in a row... responsible? Me? Hahaha.. Do I have fooled them all! The seconds tick by and the FoldingStory grasps my

BlastedHeath began to write nearly identical folds day after day. The FS medics sprang into action. They strapped him down on a large table just before he started to froth and conv

Schools out! Damn what will I do with the kids now? I can't afford to get a baby sitter. Maybe the Peace Corpse will take them for a while or the Army they'll take anyone. Iraq is

Una vez un gato se fue a la escuela.

Why, bless you're haaaart (you're so stupid)...I just love you to deeee-ath (I loathe you)...Aren't you just the sweetest thaaang (I'd shoot you if I had a gun right here)...

Jillantinace (jil-aun-teen-ay-chay) v. 1. The awkward unintentionally unified movement two people make when meeting in a narrow passage

There are some things you just can't practice, like zooming in a jet-propelled one-man rocket suit, either you do it or you don't.

The living room was a disaster area of headless dolls and strewn-about paper snowflakes. It was obviously another hit by the deadly serial killer we called "Ken" (obviously). He al

I've never been able to express myself fully. All I rely on to communicate is my charming good looks, my purrs, and occasional meows. This was one of those moments I wished I could

"Myron take a look at this huge spherical blue object in front of the Sun from NASA's satellite feed of STEREO1. I told you UFOs are real!" "Um. Isn't that the Earth?" "No way!