How many times had he told himself not to do this, stupid jungle operations always left him in a bad mood. As he pushed the brush out of the way, he was finally there. Time to

As the man walked out of his front door he could not believe what he was looking at. The disaster that was left from the tornado that swept through town left the man feeling

"This bloody time-tracking software." Kirt violently lashed out with his foot at the computer tower sitting next to him. "It's lost all my entries again." His company had always

"What's your problem?" He snapped when we entered the house. "You ruined the night just because you wanted to be a brat!" He treated me like a child, when I was a fully capable 80

I've told you before how much I hate it when you

Thats it! If i see one more misused apostofre or mispelling your dead! Said Randy. An dont come wit you're excuses like "who care's" or "i just want to get my mesage acros"

"The gate is closing!" screams the henchman, kicking his legs giddily as he waves his arms in a triumphant stance. He is probably even more excited than the actual participants.

He ran into the glass door. He left a huge greasy nose print. His pastor was inside stroking the dog with a Hair Pick. He was trying to fluffen up

I heard her screams down the telephone line. Chainsaw justice, that's how they did it here. For what? All that barbarity for what?

Caution: The female of the species is more deadly than the male. Some forgot to put a warning label of Helen of Troy. Thousands of men died needlessly because

Bald headed, bald headed, bald headed, bald...hair? There is hair on this head!?!?! Johnson damn it, that fool, that cretan. He should be pistol-whipped for this. I never thought

"Look, I've got a lot on my plate! Have YOU ever built a teleporter in YOUR backyard?"

The want ads abound with mediums offering their service, and you really have to stick out somehow to get any business. The typo in my ad "Medium exercises horny ghosts"

He lit the lamps of his hermitage and opened the doors of his soul. Finally! A lengthy reprieve from the workaday world of an alien culture. He shed the attire of exile, and put on

I woke up in the morning feeling a little shitty. I grabed my glasses and headed out the door. I'm going to hit this city, but before I leave I'm going to brush my teeth with

I think- I think if I ever make it out of this hot godforsaken desert, I will go back to being a dentist.

I am going to go play dead for the next 4 years; hold all my calls.

Fourteen years after she was abducted, trying to decide what was real and what had had been drilled in so far that it had supplanted reality was impossible. They'd started with

Assange started wikileaks because he had been kicked off the paper in high school for reporting the truth. The principle was dating the high school quarter back. He was married

Brad loved Hallowe'en now even more than he did as a kid. But somehow the bloody hand prints on the house and the big black pentagram and candles in the driveway disturbed his n