Fine, you go ahead and start the car. Meanwhile, I'll finish putting rope around the children, burn the house and make sure the neighbours keep quiet. Just don't complain when

I fumbled and dropped my last remaining clip. I'd never been good at reloading in a hurry, and the growing stench of piss was only making me more nervous - particularly due to

"ZOMBIE PONIES" was the rallying cry at Slickmo Toys Unlimited. They had already lined up the syndicated cartoon show, kid's cereal and temporary tatoos. Their next step,

There I lie, covered with warm piss, eating cold Ramen -- Chicken flavor.

"It's kind of weird, but you can't really help that the disease is going around," said former queen

Paper stacks twisted to the ceiling like MC Escher stairs in Social Worker Suzie's office. She nursed a frappucino. Her next appointment burst in. It was the Minotaur, he was

I followed the hot chick for two blocks and finally got up the nerve to ask her out when she entered a biker bar. I hesitated and then entered. Everyone turned to stare

The old man hobbled and complained incessantly. This is why his grandchildren

It was the second to the last day for the National Writing Project fellows. After a gratifying four weeks of writing boot camp, they were about to be free. Then things got weird.

"Mr. White, are you stil with us? Oh no, he's losing to much blood! We need a medic! Jones aid the the left bunker while i go get help," yelled Price. All of the sudden, a grenade

It was happening. It was finally happening.I was shaking with fear as I realized that it was going to be all over.It was unfair that I was here to see it happen. What happened was,

if your happy an u no it clap ur hands (clap_clap) if you happy an u no it clap ur hands (clap_clap) if ur happy and u noe it and ur face will surely show it if ur happy an u no it

There was a girl who loved to go shopping. Everyday when she got home from school she would get her purse and go to the mall. She never wore the same outfit. Her only problem was

D0nt U H@t3 wh3N ppl Tw@lK l!k3 Th!S haha

Looking around all he saw were turkeys. Six-foot tall, wild turkeys. He'd been cornered. Now, all he could do was

Monkeys like butter and banana flavored jelly beans, its hard sometimes to grab these delicacies from small children who

Looks like there was more wet here now than this past summer, Eddie thought to himself, moving closer to the edge but fearful to get too close to the

American flag burnings re-energized the group and trash cans were lit on fire. Protestors then moved newspaper stands into the street to create barricades against

When the city of Denver is remembered, it will be remembered for the way its soldiers fought and died against the fearsome militants of Arizona and their eradication machines.

I can't believe she had really done it. In the middle of a busy highway, in the middle of the afternoon, in the middle of an intense argument she just up and